[ambient music]
Bhavna Panangipally:
I don't know, honestly, when my mental health challenges started off. What I do remember is not feeling okay.
Lexus Davis:
I suffer from depression, anxiety, panic disorder, and borderline personality disorder.
Matt Evans:
I've had a number of different bouts of depression. It is…the tears, the locking yourself away, the inability to make a decision.
Matt Dorney:
I couldn't relax. I felt like I wanted to jump out of my own skin.
Jeanne Sun:
My ability to be resilient and to get through things fine was suddenly in question.
Bhavna Panangipally:
One day, I was driving to work. I just wanted to jump from a moving vehicle.
Matt Dorney:
My thoughts of hurting myself were becoming stronger. What if I got in an accident and I didn't survive it?
Jeanne Sun:
I knew to be able to do all the things that I needed to do in my day to day, I was going to need to get more help and more support from all the systems around me, both in my life and at work, but also professional help.
Lexus Davis:
When I realized I needed help, I did reach out to my manager who was able to put me into contact with our onsite psychologist.
Matt Dorney:
We do have a therapist who is part of J.P. Morgan who sits in our kind of health and wellness area, and I made an appointment with him and talked to him.
Jeanne Sun:
Working with a therapist really helped me process my emotions and reactions around what was happening.
Matt Evans:
So I became aware of “This is Me” when I saw articles written on the J.P. Morgan Intranet and I was fascinated and inspired by some of the stories that people were publishing.
Lexus Davis:
I decided to share my story because I didn't see anybody that looked like me sharing their story, someone African-American, female, queer. We typically don't talk about these things.
Matt Dorney:
My story can own me or I can own my story. And I wanted to own my story.
Bhavna Panangipally:
So after my story came out, folks reached out to me and they continue to reach out to me even now.
Jeanne Sun:
The response was so positive, I can't even begin to describe. To all the colleagues and people who reached out, I am just so grateful.
Matt Dorney:
There was a gentleman who reached out to me who just seemed like he was in a similar place to where I was. And we just kind of talked through it. I think we both left that conversation feeling better than we’d started it.
Lexus Davis:
After receiving all this support, it made me feel like I'm somebody that my company cares about.
Bhavna Panangipally:
I felt like I was part of this one big family where when you ask for help, they’re just so many people around.
Matt Evans:
My advice to someone who is struggling with a mental health challenge would be: number 1, to acknowledge it.
Bhavna Panangipally:
Reach out to somebody you trust and take that first step.
Matt Evans:
Not only get help outside of work, so doctors, psychologists, therapists, psychiatrists. I would also work out very quickly who your kind of support network is. The friends, the colleagues, the family.
Lexus Davis:
I think it's important for managers to discuss mental health with their teams and to discuss the resources that are available. That just opens the door for your colleagues to be comfortable.
Matt Dorney:
It's not like I got sick and now I'm better, and, you know, "the end." There's things that I continue to do today in order to, you know, show up as as my best self.
Matt Evans:
Walking, exercise, jogging in the fresh air.
Jeanne Sun:
Talking with others about what I went through has definitely helped me feel less alone.
Bhavna Panangipally:
It's just been onwards and upwards of loving myself, loving my life, loving those around me.
Lexus Davis:
Some days I'm quiet and it's okay; I'm fine. I'm very vocal, honest about what's going on. But everybody just shows a lot of support and care, and it's genuine.
Matt Dorney:
You don't need to suffer in silence. Reach out for help. You'll be glad you did.
END